A Look Back, A Look Forward, And a Look In.

A Look Back:
What happened? As you may have guessed this is the part where I talk about the nearly two year absence of new posts. So again, what happened? I'm afraid there's not much I can say about why I didn't post, I can only restate the obvious fact that I didn't. There were so many ideas cooking up in my head which never saw the light of day, there were even a couple of times when I started to write and then, a few sentences in, deleted everything. While I have my doubts as to how much help my simple ramblings were to people, I hope that my posts were at least able to provide a different perspective to get you think about your own beliefs and I am truly sorry for my total disappearance.

A Look Forward:
What's going to happen? Well, I'm afraid I have to be just as bad as I was with what had happened. Simply put: I don't know. I would like to promise that I will post more frequently, but I really can't. My hope is that I will be able to at least provide a look in at certain aspects of my life and faith that I've been going through and that you may also be going through. For the present however, I will again be starting classes at college very soon and will be working through the fall so I don't know if I'll have the will (or sanity) to write. Currently I will not be promoting the blog on any sites unless and until I get something out fairly regularly.

A Look In:
What is happening? Well, this summer has been fairly... stressful for me. I've been really trying to nail down what I want to become and also who I'm becoming. Those may sound like the same thing, but I can assure you, they are not.
Who I want to become: this is mainly just what sort of job do I want and then what sort of things will I need to do to get there. And while I have these locked in for the moment (until the new semester starts) I still have to wonder if this is really what I'm meant to be doing. It's a difficult question and it starts to tie in with the other thing: who am I becoming? I think this is probably something that just about everyone has to face at some time or another. It's a much broader question than the first, since it can encompass everything about a person from their job to their personality to their faith to their looks. Yes, I do think that looks play a role in this, as people tend to judge you based on how you look so I think it would be a bad idea to leave them out, you just have to remember their place.
The second question was a fairly recent arrival to my already overcrowded mind and has been an extremely poor house guest, refusing to be quiet and settle down with the rest of my thoughts. However I think that it's one of those necessary things. Something to push you beyond what you currently are, to challenge you and probably change you. I'll be honest, I've generally been pretty comfortable with who I am, I knew my flaws (or thought I did) and I gradually came to accept them. I saw myself through my eyes but I realize my eyes aren't the ones that count.
It hasn't been fun, it hasn't been peaceful, it certainly hasn't been convenient, and I'm afraid it hasn't been finished. But it has been good.

And so, I end this with a simple question. To you.
Who are you becoming?
E&V -Chris